tonight i seek Him under falling water, washing away the day's soil with a heart restless to be cleansed by living water. this split-ness, duality of desires and mind being worked out through Him. as He gently guides in love and truth, Shepherd of this heart, i begin to see.
multifaceted...
no, not this word evoking images of glistening gems viewed from different angles. brilliance of design, workmanship.
no, not multifaceted as i once thought.
most accurately, double-sided...
this duality of two completely opposing thoughts battling for viability is not how He created me to exist through the every day. like double-sided tape, if one side is adhering to a specific resolve, the other is exposed and vulnerable to stick to anything that happens to come along.
tossing back and forth, my views change with emotions, hormones, differing perspectives and experiences.
yet truth illuminates the culprit aiding in these mental distractions,
emotional diversions,
settling fog.
all these things wrap into the package of self.
self-serving,
self-seeking,
self-fulfilling,
self-ruling -
my sin stares back at me.
silencing tongue, closing eyes, stilling thoughts - You remind me of words sung Sunday. words to illuminate, encapsulate and pray-
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
Shepherd of my life, i feel this heart inside prone to wander, prone to leave the One i love. Bind my wandering heart to You. take my heart and seal it. fix my eyes on You.
Monday, July 21
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